firstly i am now declaring "rent" as my most favourite musical ever. jonathan larson is a pure genius. anyway, let me quote one song from that musical that will serve as my life's manual for the incoming 2008:
*** warning: this is a cheesy post. if you are a close minded envious person, then don't read further...
SEASONS OF LOVE
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Moments so dear
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
How Do You Measure - Measure A Year?
In Daylights - In Sunsets
In Midnights - In Cups Of Coffee
In Inches - In Miles
In Laughter - In Strife
In - Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
How Do You Measure
A Year In The Life?
How About Love?
How About Love?
How About Love?
Measure In Love
Seasons of Love.
Seasons of Love.
Joanne:
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Journeys To Plan
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
How Do You Measure The Life
Of A Woman Or A Man
Collins:
In Truth That She Learned
Or In Times That He Cried
In Bridges He Burned
Or The Way That She Died
All:
It's Time Now - To Sing Out
Though The Story Never Ends
Let's Celebrate
Remember A Year In The Life Of Friends
Remember the Love
Remember the Love
Remember the Love
Measure In Love
Joanne:
(Oh you got to you got to remember the love,)
(You know that love is a gift from up above)
(Share love, give love, spread love)
(Measure, measure your life in love.)
ALL
Seasons Of Love(2x)
Joanne:
(Measure your life, measure your life in love)
stop wrinkling your forehead. i haven't found a boyfriend yet to get engrossed with a song that endlessly repeats "love". i may get bitter about stupid things once in a while but i still like hearing that "l" word. i may not be romantically involved yet but i still love my roller coaster life. so that's love you got there. and it's the first requirement before you venture out into loving others.
looking back at the things that i did or the things that were done for me in 2007, i have to say that this is the best year of my life so far. it was indeed five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes well spent. from family, pinas besties, school mates, pinoy night mates, phk-mates, ppc-hk mates, blog mates, upaa-hk mates, bar mates, gym mates, office mates - every one of them did a good job making me feel like everything just fell into place. i felt really loved and i hope i did a good job making them feel that they are loved, too.
in a few days we'll be re-starting the default mark of that five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes for a new beginning. i wish everybody makes use of them wisely and spread the love.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Thursday, December 27, 2007
the guy with good lip service...
is coming over in a few days. i should be happy, right? then why am i scared?
bummer. bummer.
bummer. bummer.
how did you spend your christmas?
it's my most hated holiday of the year. don't fret christmas lovers, it's personal. well apart from that personal thing, i hate christmas because of the hypocrisy it brings. of course i love red calendar days but the idea of having to smile and treat everybody as your friend is just plain ridiculous just because papa jesus was born. there were even studies that he wasn't born on that day. anyway, all my christmases were so bad. it's one of the most depressing time of the year for me. that's why i always say "happy holidays" instead of "merry christmas".
anyway, i spent it differently this year. i just chilled out with my newfound best bud at my favorite place. little speakers humming beautiful tunes, chilly weather, peel orange, life talks. we we're having a good relaxing time that we didn't even notice that the clock struck 12 already. no noche buena. no hugging. no pretentious smiles. just the perfect way of spending it, methinks.
anyway, i spent it differently this year. i just chilled out with my newfound best bud at my favorite place. little speakers humming beautiful tunes, chilly weather, peel orange, life talks. we we're having a good relaxing time that we didn't even notice that the clock struck 12 already. no noche buena. no hugging. no pretentious smiles. just the perfect way of spending it, methinks.
cool website
i came across this website where people send their "secrets" through home-made postcards.
http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
it's amazing how one photo with little caption can tell a whole story. every pixel, every scribble, you can feel the real emotions and pains in every postcard. it's real life drama at its best. i could symphatize with what they feel. we've got secrets left and right - feelings better kept than expressed.
secrets. yeah, it's the 's' word. most hated yet most utilized.
http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
it's amazing how one photo with little caption can tell a whole story. every pixel, every scribble, you can feel the real emotions and pains in every postcard. it's real life drama at its best. i could symphatize with what they feel. we've got secrets left and right - feelings better kept than expressed.
secrets. yeah, it's the 's' word. most hated yet most utilized.
Monday, December 24, 2007
yeba!
i won a 4gb ipod nano in our christmas party a while ago! yeba!
woot! woot!
this is a lucky year for me when in comes to raffles! i won an adidas gc which i never got to redeem in the flickr launch, and now... and now... ipod! yeba!
isa pa! yeba!
woot! woot!
this is a lucky year for me when in comes to raffles! i won an adidas gc which i never got to redeem in the flickr launch, and now... and now... ipod! yeba!
isa pa! yeba!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
crazy night
I just experienced the most uncontrolled night of my life.
My friend Bryan sort of invited himself to my flat last night. A nomad meets nomad, that's how you call it. How about telling me that he's on the tram already? Hehe, I’ve done the same thing before. Well he’s lucky I was just home watching Star Cinema’s “Ang Cute Ina Mo”. I see rolling eyes now. It’s funny nevertheless.
I never thought that it would be the remedy to another boring night. We started with watching the French movie Priceless while snacking on to rubbish food. Then we’re off to Lan Kwai Fong. I tried to be pa-sosyal so I ordered a Cosmopolitan when I am really just a Smirnoff Ice baby. I was dressed like a real lady with my tube dress and new shoes but I guess I ruined it by not getting my senses up as I usually do. I was too tipsy after three sips. I am that of a teetotaller! Good thing Bryan was good enough to ask once in a while if I was ok and look after me. It’s a shame that somebody 3 years my junior is taking care of me, haha! Oh well, we have our trashy moments once in a while. You just have to assess that someone’s present to back you up. We transferred to Cavern and we were given free drinks by the guy who was supposedly a member of the band “Dayo”. And then that was the end for Bryan. He lost it as well. Picture two drunk individuals walking along Des Voeux Road uttering senseless statements at the top of their lungs while giggling and tripping every ten seconds. Oh, and we were singing “Big Girls Don’t Cry”, too! Haha! That’s what I got for standing up to my principle. Heels + Tipsy + 10 minute walk = certainly not a good combination.
Bryan took me home and I was the least accommodating host ever! I went straight to my room and cuddled in my lovable pillows and comforters. I was dead in 2 seconds – with my party clothes still on sans washing my face or brushing my teeth. He tried talking to me but I was really unresponsive to say the least. He claimed to have slept for one hour and left. I woke up five hours later because I could feel vibrating phone thumping through my head. He left his phone on my bed. I was too thirsty so I stood up, only to find my flat in hopeless condition with ice cream dripping on the floor and cigarette ashes.
Freaking hangover.
Overall, it was a crazy night. Crazy and fun. :)
My friend Bryan sort of invited himself to my flat last night. A nomad meets nomad, that's how you call it. How about telling me that he's on the tram already? Hehe, I’ve done the same thing before. Well he’s lucky I was just home watching Star Cinema’s “Ang Cute Ina Mo”. I see rolling eyes now. It’s funny nevertheless.
I never thought that it would be the remedy to another boring night. We started with watching the French movie Priceless while snacking on to rubbish food. Then we’re off to Lan Kwai Fong. I tried to be pa-sosyal so I ordered a Cosmopolitan when I am really just a Smirnoff Ice baby. I was dressed like a real lady with my tube dress and new shoes but I guess I ruined it by not getting my senses up as I usually do. I was too tipsy after three sips. I am that of a teetotaller! Good thing Bryan was good enough to ask once in a while if I was ok and look after me. It’s a shame that somebody 3 years my junior is taking care of me, haha! Oh well, we have our trashy moments once in a while. You just have to assess that someone’s present to back you up. We transferred to Cavern and we were given free drinks by the guy who was supposedly a member of the band “Dayo”. And then that was the end for Bryan. He lost it as well. Picture two drunk individuals walking along Des Voeux Road uttering senseless statements at the top of their lungs while giggling and tripping every ten seconds. Oh, and we were singing “Big Girls Don’t Cry”, too! Haha! That’s what I got for standing up to my principle. Heels + Tipsy + 10 minute walk = certainly not a good combination.
Bryan took me home and I was the least accommodating host ever! I went straight to my room and cuddled in my lovable pillows and comforters. I was dead in 2 seconds – with my party clothes still on sans washing my face or brushing my teeth. He tried talking to me but I was really unresponsive to say the least. He claimed to have slept for one hour and left. I woke up five hours later because I could feel vibrating phone thumping through my head. He left his phone on my bed. I was too thirsty so I stood up, only to find my flat in hopeless condition with ice cream dripping on the floor and cigarette ashes.
Freaking hangover.
Overall, it was a crazy night. Crazy and fun. :)
i can't get over it...
maroon v's won't go home without you is freaking addicting!
it's like a pill. i have to listen to it every night for at least 5 times. if not, i'd act like a tranny woman in menopausal stage.
it's not over night...
thank god for youtube! and for the anonymous guy who shares his wireless connection.
it's like a pill. i have to listen to it every night for at least 5 times. if not, i'd act like a tranny woman in menopausal stage.
it's not over night...
thank god for youtube! and for the anonymous guy who shares his wireless connection.
Saturday, December 22, 2007
the photographer re-emerges
i've had my dslr since my birthday, but i never got to use it right away. i have been battered by continuous business trips that i forgot that i've had my most expensive acquisition.
that is until last night. woohoo! i was able to chill out in my secret tambayan at the top of ifc mall. it was a splendid view out there and luckily i was able to take photos of some hk structures. i am very proud of some shots because they really turned out well. my camera mentor dave is right: dslr's are so addictingly amazing that you'd never go back to those little cutesy digicams.
i may not be good at it yet, but i dare say that i am improving. it's completely different from my panasonic camera, although the latter is not so bad. but with my bestfriend nikon, it's all about control. it's all about endless trials. it's all about being at peace with yourself and your subject.
anyway, enough of the bs, here are my best shots for the night:
that's ifc, the tallest building in hk, avec la lune
i've been a frequent visitor of this place for the last few months. this the train station to the airport.
a giant glass structure. kudos to its maker
the tip. the ifc. the four seasons. the moon.
view from the red bar. that's kowloon island. this is my most favourite shot for the night. after i saw this in the lcd of the cam, i experienced that feeling in animated films where the excited character clutches her hands, raises her shoulder, lets out her tongue, smiles widely, closes her eyes and dreams happily. it's simply priceless.
and the place closest to my heart, after pinas of course - hk:
more photos soon...
that is until last night. woohoo! i was able to chill out in my secret tambayan at the top of ifc mall. it was a splendid view out there and luckily i was able to take photos of some hk structures. i am very proud of some shots because they really turned out well. my camera mentor dave is right: dslr's are so addictingly amazing that you'd never go back to those little cutesy digicams.
i may not be good at it yet, but i dare say that i am improving. it's completely different from my panasonic camera, although the latter is not so bad. but with my bestfriend nikon, it's all about control. it's all about endless trials. it's all about being at peace with yourself and your subject.
anyway, enough of the bs, here are my best shots for the night:
that's ifc, the tallest building in hk, avec la lune
i've been a frequent visitor of this place for the last few months. this the train station to the airport.
a giant glass structure. kudos to its maker
the tip. the ifc. the four seasons. the moon.
view from the red bar. that's kowloon island. this is my most favourite shot for the night. after i saw this in the lcd of the cam, i experienced that feeling in animated films where the excited character clutches her hands, raises her shoulder, lets out her tongue, smiles widely, closes her eyes and dreams happily. it's simply priceless.
and the place closest to my heart, after pinas of course - hk:
more photos soon...
Friday, December 21, 2007
if my life were a book...
It’ll be filled with supposed romantic chapters with prologues that never got epilogues. The plot isn’t established yet but it ends right there, just when the writer is still describing the setting, it’ll be time to turn to another chapter – which is another disappointing waste of brain cell use.
You’d be surprised why I am making a big fuss out of all of this. Yes I know that I don’t need anybody to complete me. I love my life. I have a lot of things to do to keep me from getting bored. I haven’t explored my dslr, I haven’t touched my newly bought keyboard organ, I have an Allende and Picoult to finish, I have a dozen new movies in line for my dvd player, I have a photoshop manual to master, I have three weeks of laundry to do, and I have to clean my flat that can easily convince anybody that four super typhoons enjoyed co-habiting with me.
My friends will laugh at me (or feel sorry for me for getting this pathetic) when they read this post. Yes I know I have my whole youth days ahead of me. Yes I know that having a relationship is supposed to happen naturally. It’ll be a disaster if you force yourself into it. But hell, try being in my place. I feel lonely. Hard core lonely. No consolation can pull me out of it. Don’t even try to play the social awareness card. I know there are starving kids in Africa and that polar bears are getting extinct. I feel lonely, and I am entitled to rant about it.
I am not asking for too much. I am not looking for somebody with riches or good-looks (although that would be a bonus).
I just need somebody who:
1. Has clean teeth
2. Will ask how my day turned out
3. Will say good night
4. Will say that he misses me when I am out of the country
5. Will show excitement that I’m back
6. Will smile when I try to get things my way by playing the little girl card, and I’d see in his eyes that look that says “Shit, I’m so foolish for doing this but hell…damn it, I really love you. Fine.”
Is that too much to ask?
Note to self: You are so going to die alone, blsm. You know these men are polar bear extinct. Or gay.
Shet naman.
You’d be surprised why I am making a big fuss out of all of this. Yes I know that I don’t need anybody to complete me. I love my life. I have a lot of things to do to keep me from getting bored. I haven’t explored my dslr, I haven’t touched my newly bought keyboard organ, I have an Allende and Picoult to finish, I have a dozen new movies in line for my dvd player, I have a photoshop manual to master, I have three weeks of laundry to do, and I have to clean my flat that can easily convince anybody that four super typhoons enjoyed co-habiting with me.
My friends will laugh at me (or feel sorry for me for getting this pathetic) when they read this post. Yes I know I have my whole youth days ahead of me. Yes I know that having a relationship is supposed to happen naturally. It’ll be a disaster if you force yourself into it. But hell, try being in my place. I feel lonely. Hard core lonely. No consolation can pull me out of it. Don’t even try to play the social awareness card. I know there are starving kids in Africa and that polar bears are getting extinct. I feel lonely, and I am entitled to rant about it.
I am not asking for too much. I am not looking for somebody with riches or good-looks (although that would be a bonus).
I just need somebody who:
1. Has clean teeth
2. Will ask how my day turned out
3. Will say good night
4. Will say that he misses me when I am out of the country
5. Will show excitement that I’m back
6. Will smile when I try to get things my way by playing the little girl card, and I’d see in his eyes that look that says “Shit, I’m so foolish for doing this but hell…damn it, I really love you. Fine.”
Is that too much to ask?
Note to self: You are so going to die alone, blsm. You know these men are polar bear extinct. Or gay.
Shet naman.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
maroon v is coming to manila next year! woohoo!
my hands are shaking from too much excitement!
maroon v! maroon v!
have to stop eating now! have to save up for front row seats! front row seats!
my hands are shaking from too much excitement!
maroon v! maroon v!
have to stop eating now! have to save up for front row seats! front row seats!
why i am broke now.. dead broke.
After endless spending since August, I got another major acquisition.
I got a new laptop!! Woohoo!
I keep on thinking of this as an impulse purchase, but I’ve been wanting to buy one for a long time now. I think that this is the last gadget that I’d like to have, except for additional lenses to my camera of course. I want to have an investment that will enable me to surf Youtube 24/7, enhance my prized photos, and to prepare me when I pursue further studies after my contract with my present company expires.
No regrets.
I’m loving this notebook now!
Thanks to my friend Dave who accompanied me when I purchased it, and to the guy who has been sharing his wireless connection.
Meanwhile let me continue watching the fourth instalment of Kasal, Kasali Kasalo in Youtube. Freaking funny. Haha!
I got a new laptop!! Woohoo!
I keep on thinking of this as an impulse purchase, but I’ve been wanting to buy one for a long time now. I think that this is the last gadget that I’d like to have, except for additional lenses to my camera of course. I want to have an investment that will enable me to surf Youtube 24/7, enhance my prized photos, and to prepare me when I pursue further studies after my contract with my present company expires.
No regrets.
I’m loving this notebook now!
Thanks to my friend Dave who accompanied me when I purchased it, and to the guy who has been sharing his wireless connection.
Meanwhile let me continue watching the fourth instalment of Kasal, Kasali Kasalo in Youtube. Freaking funny. Haha!
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
guess where i am now?
this is definitely a sosyalan moment, a lot of first time right at this vey minute:
1. sunbathing! coming from a tropical country, i never enjoyed the sun this much. battered by winter from different countries and overworking, the sun is absolutely a precious gem. it's quite windy, but it's still sunny. woohoo! i hope i get sun marks before i go to the airport. asa pa!
2. wearing branty (bra + panty) in the middle of mexico city! haha! daring eh? im getting too unhealthy because of lack of vitamin d, so what the heck! ill expose my uber curvy body and flaunt it at the penthouse of the hotel, infront of 3 hotel staff. i knew these underwear-swimsuit would come in handy.
3. writing a blog almost naked. if i'd been a little inspired now, this post would have been a little kinky. but im not, sorry.
4. enjoying quality time with myself. i cant remember when i've been in such a euphoric state. this is just the perfect recipe to wrap up my uber draining two week business trip and realize that i don't need anybody to be happy: getting naked. flowing water. sun. grooving to my mp3 files. knowledge that i can rest from work for the next 40hours. and the knowledge that i'll party hard this weekend.
gotta dress up now.. have a flight to catch.
sunlight, oh sunlight...
ciao!
1. sunbathing! coming from a tropical country, i never enjoyed the sun this much. battered by winter from different countries and overworking, the sun is absolutely a precious gem. it's quite windy, but it's still sunny. woohoo! i hope i get sun marks before i go to the airport. asa pa!
2. wearing branty (bra + panty) in the middle of mexico city! haha! daring eh? im getting too unhealthy because of lack of vitamin d, so what the heck! ill expose my uber curvy body and flaunt it at the penthouse of the hotel, infront of 3 hotel staff. i knew these underwear-swimsuit would come in handy.
3. writing a blog almost naked. if i'd been a little inspired now, this post would have been a little kinky. but im not, sorry.
4. enjoying quality time with myself. i cant remember when i've been in such a euphoric state. this is just the perfect recipe to wrap up my uber draining two week business trip and realize that i don't need anybody to be happy: getting naked. flowing water. sun. grooving to my mp3 files. knowledge that i can rest from work for the next 40hours. and the knowledge that i'll party hard this weekend.
gotta dress up now.. have a flight to catch.
sunlight, oh sunlight...
ciao!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
the last time i cried...
was last night. i watched my bestfriend's wedding and it really moved me to tears at four in the morning. it's my tenth time to watch it but it only had such impact on me until then.
this loneliness is killing me.
must.
find.
a.
boyfriend.
this loneliness is killing me.
must.
find.
a.
boyfriend.
Monday, December 10, 2007
the little girl comes home
I feel like Carrie Bradshaw now trying to write something sensible when she is just randomly speaking her mind. My boss lent me her laptop so I can still continue working while in Mexico alone for three days. I still need to do market research during the day and I have to attend to my emails and orders that have been backlogged in HK when I return to the hotel. But enough about my super demanding job for the meantime. Can I just say that this crazy fun? How about writing while on board a plane and watching Ratatouille? Very chic yuppie, eh?
Let me write about my homecoming. This is long overdue but I’d still want to write about it. I may not have much to share but I want to record what I felt during this event when I reread my posts. It is an event filled with emotions and I want to be remembered as much as I want to.
The most important about it was that I was able to rest. I had been working for 20 hours per day that I could sometimes forget that I hadn’t peed all day, or that I hadn’t eaten my dinner due to the pile of work. It is really crazy shit, and I have to admit that it was semi self-imposed. Being a Virgo, I am really a perfectionist and I take work seriously. I hate it when work gets held up just because one is not responsible enough to treat everything he/she does as a definition of himself/herself. I look down on people who leave things for tomorrow what they could do today. Anyway, I was able to get my rest – just enough to compensate for more than one year of insufficient sleep.
I was able to see my family. Things have definitely turned around and I have much great say on what happens at home now. I am technically the one who puts food on the table – just the way when kids grow up and take care of their parents. It was indeed a devastating blow when my father lost his job and pension because of politics inside his company. Imagine having to depend on your daughter financially when you used to be the “king” of the house for more than two decades. I could just imagine his fear of living an unsecured later life. It was also a blow for me because I know I am not yet ready. But I guess you’ll never know if it’s the right time until it hits you, so you just have to face it. No more quarter life crisis for me then. But saying all of these, I have to say that I hadn’t respected my parents until then. Resilience is really synonymous with our surname and I can say that we were able to recover gradually. My mother, as usual, is the head of the head of the household and I never appreciated her strength until I saw how she worked hard to make things work. My father is also very much dedicated on doing household works (apart from helping my mother), which he’s never ashamed of. I respect them for putting up the pieces and getting more united more than ever. And don’t forget my loving sister! She’s my complete opposite. If you ask me who’s the kindest person I’ve met, I’d definitely nominate her. While I bitch around and rant incessantly, she’s there acting like the matured sibling filled with generosity and understanding. And of course my protégé Anjelica. She’s so much grown up now – and still very sweet and adorable. She’s the only reason why I want to have a kid of my own.
As in my previous post, I was able to see some friends. It’s a pity that I hadn’t seen more of them (I have to blame the weather for that), but I’ll see them early next year anyway. The friends that I saw were the people that I would want to see anyway. I never felt a sense of estrangement when I saw them. Of course we missed a lot of each other the past year and a half, but I have to give them credit for making me feel like I am still very welcomed in their lives.
I once again experienced the bad things generally innate in Philippine culture that I thankfully escaped – scarcity of decent public transportation, horrible traffic, smoke belchers, idle women who waste their time about gossiping, pretentious café drinkers, spitting drivers, smelly public restrooms, crowded malls and those unemployed men who drink until early morning while doing karaoke on the streets. But hell yeah, it’s still what I call home. And I guess I will always come back even if I am working in Hong Kong but currently in Mexico and still experiencing jetlag from Chile. Because despite these, no where else I can see genuine smiles, good sunshine, company of friends, the liberty to express emotions to my heart’s content, and the loving arms of the people waiting for my next homecoming.
Let me write about my homecoming. This is long overdue but I’d still want to write about it. I may not have much to share but I want to record what I felt during this event when I reread my posts. It is an event filled with emotions and I want to be remembered as much as I want to.
The most important about it was that I was able to rest. I had been working for 20 hours per day that I could sometimes forget that I hadn’t peed all day, or that I hadn’t eaten my dinner due to the pile of work. It is really crazy shit, and I have to admit that it was semi self-imposed. Being a Virgo, I am really a perfectionist and I take work seriously. I hate it when work gets held up just because one is not responsible enough to treat everything he/she does as a definition of himself/herself. I look down on people who leave things for tomorrow what they could do today. Anyway, I was able to get my rest – just enough to compensate for more than one year of insufficient sleep.
I was able to see my family. Things have definitely turned around and I have much great say on what happens at home now. I am technically the one who puts food on the table – just the way when kids grow up and take care of their parents. It was indeed a devastating blow when my father lost his job and pension because of politics inside his company. Imagine having to depend on your daughter financially when you used to be the “king” of the house for more than two decades. I could just imagine his fear of living an unsecured later life. It was also a blow for me because I know I am not yet ready. But I guess you’ll never know if it’s the right time until it hits you, so you just have to face it. No more quarter life crisis for me then. But saying all of these, I have to say that I hadn’t respected my parents until then. Resilience is really synonymous with our surname and I can say that we were able to recover gradually. My mother, as usual, is the head of the head of the household and I never appreciated her strength until I saw how she worked hard to make things work. My father is also very much dedicated on doing household works (apart from helping my mother), which he’s never ashamed of. I respect them for putting up the pieces and getting more united more than ever. And don’t forget my loving sister! She’s my complete opposite. If you ask me who’s the kindest person I’ve met, I’d definitely nominate her. While I bitch around and rant incessantly, she’s there acting like the matured sibling filled with generosity and understanding. And of course my protégé Anjelica. She’s so much grown up now – and still very sweet and adorable. She’s the only reason why I want to have a kid of my own.
As in my previous post, I was able to see some friends. It’s a pity that I hadn’t seen more of them (I have to blame the weather for that), but I’ll see them early next year anyway. The friends that I saw were the people that I would want to see anyway. I never felt a sense of estrangement when I saw them. Of course we missed a lot of each other the past year and a half, but I have to give them credit for making me feel like I am still very welcomed in their lives.
I once again experienced the bad things generally innate in Philippine culture that I thankfully escaped – scarcity of decent public transportation, horrible traffic, smoke belchers, idle women who waste their time about gossiping, pretentious café drinkers, spitting drivers, smelly public restrooms, crowded malls and those unemployed men who drink until early morning while doing karaoke on the streets. But hell yeah, it’s still what I call home. And I guess I will always come back even if I am working in Hong Kong but currently in Mexico and still experiencing jetlag from Chile. Because despite these, no where else I can see genuine smiles, good sunshine, company of friends, the liberty to express emotions to my heart’s content, and the loving arms of the people waiting for my next homecoming.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
la tierra chilena
im going to chile. but we'll go to mexico first then do a few days stop over in chile. we need to do a big presentation to the big boss of the biggest retailer chain in chile and do a little market research as well. i'll be going with my female boss. she was unbelievably nice to me when i returned. she said how she struggled with her father just so i could go. the big boss doesn't want me to travel anymore but she claimed to have fought her way through it over lunch one sunday. and to think that i was even scared returning to hk because i didn't check my email and i didn't give them any contact number in the philippines. i could just imagine her fury only to be welcomed with loving arms when i stepped into her room yesterday.
ill be gone for two weeks and im leaving this friday. i haven't even cleaned my apartment before my homecoming and im set to fly again in five days.
this is my visa, which took me 30 mins to process. i wish all visa processing all over the world was this efficient.
after the chilean trip, ill be returning to mexico and do a few more days market research ALONE. my boss is returning to hk after santiago. syet, wish me luck!
ill be gone for two weeks and im leaving this friday. i haven't even cleaned my apartment before my homecoming and im set to fly again in five days.
this is my visa, which took me 30 mins to process. i wish all visa processing all over the world was this efficient.
after the chilean trip, ill be returning to mexico and do a few more days market research ALONE. my boss is returning to hk after santiago. syet, wish me luck!
Monday, November 26, 2007
due to insistent public demand
these are my pics with the friends that i was able to meet during my homecoming.
firstly, don't forget my high school besties. these two ladies have been with me when i was still a confused teenager. now they're lecturing me about things that i've been dying to experience. i know they are going to be there for me until we grow old.
and then off to a night in manila i went. due to bad weather forecasts, my manila visit kept on getting postponed. i went ahead anyway one night and came back home the following early morning.
these are the guys who have been with me during my college days. they're all big time career persons in their own rights. one's a regional manager who just travels very often around the country bullying the sales staff, a qc analyst who gets to dictate her inferiors' bonus, and don't forget the trainor who imparts knowledge on the ambitious neophytes. kudos guys! you made it at such a young age! this is an MYOP moment. make your orgullomate proud.
sorry allan, i have to include you, my boy toy. i just love you. kindly note that he's not my current prospect.
and these girls are just the sweetest. my bora mates, my flat mate, my yosi mate, my filthy-dorm mates, my greenbelt mates, my rockwell mates, etc. every moment i share with you is all about laughter and fun. these guys are the reason why i spend beyond my means. and i have to say that i love them for it.
all together now! thanks guys for putting up with me until early in the morning on a thursday.
sabi nga ni rhoda: what's one night in two years? mwugs!
firstly, don't forget my high school besties. these two ladies have been with me when i was still a confused teenager. now they're lecturing me about things that i've been dying to experience. i know they are going to be there for me until we grow old.
and then off to a night in manila i went. due to bad weather forecasts, my manila visit kept on getting postponed. i went ahead anyway one night and came back home the following early morning.
these are the guys who have been with me during my college days. they're all big time career persons in their own rights. one's a regional manager who just travels very often around the country bullying the sales staff, a qc analyst who gets to dictate her inferiors' bonus, and don't forget the trainor who imparts knowledge on the ambitious neophytes. kudos guys! you made it at such a young age! this is an MYOP moment. make your orgullomate proud.
sorry allan, i have to include you, my boy toy. i just love you. kindly note that he's not my current prospect.
and these girls are just the sweetest. my bora mates, my flat mate, my yosi mate, my filthy-dorm mates, my greenbelt mates, my rockwell mates, etc. every moment i share with you is all about laughter and fun. these guys are the reason why i spend beyond my means. and i have to say that i love them for it.
all together now! thanks guys for putting up with me until early in the morning on a thursday.
sabi nga ni rhoda: what's one night in two years? mwugs!
before i write endlessly about my homecoming...
i have one story to share. this story taught me the greatest realization that i've acquired for the longest time. background: the break up with my last ex was the messiest you could ever imagine. r is the girl who replaced me. the replacement process was a big traumatic experience.
scenario 1:
my ex is into selling shirts and r sells them at their office. this i know since i was offered the shirts long time ago. i didn't know if they are still together. anyway, i came over to her office last week.
r: do you want to buy shirts?
me: oh, "those" shirts
r: yeah. "those" shirts
a few seconds of silence. then small chitchat afterwards.
scenario 2:
r: do you think this is awkward?
me: what "this"?
r: you. me.
me: no.
r: good.
and you know what? it really isn't awkward anymore! i may be forever scarred by the experience, but i guess i have completely moved on. besides, seeing my college bestfriend happy has been one of the best rewards that came out of it. she really deserves to be happy. some may call it finally accepting defeat, but i think there was no competition to begin with. so to r and r, just take care of each other, alright?
meanwhile, i've got a lot of things to look forward to. ive been stuck in my idealistic outlook in life and i have to be open to the new world that awaits me.
im speaking this as a general rule, i will..
admit what i needed to admit.
appear furious when im furious.
scream when im hurt.
sing to the top of my lungs when i feel like it.
dance when my hips call for it.
cease comparing the present with the past.
stop putting up with jerks.
live life to the fullest.
this is called stop hypocrisy movement. do your own share. let your repressed self break free full blast. life is too short for apprehensions.
scenario 1:
my ex is into selling shirts and r sells them at their office. this i know since i was offered the shirts long time ago. i didn't know if they are still together. anyway, i came over to her office last week.
r: do you want to buy shirts?
me: oh, "those" shirts
r: yeah. "those" shirts
a few seconds of silence. then small chitchat afterwards.
scenario 2:
r: do you think this is awkward?
me: what "this"?
r: you. me.
me: no.
r: good.
and you know what? it really isn't awkward anymore! i may be forever scarred by the experience, but i guess i have completely moved on. besides, seeing my college bestfriend happy has been one of the best rewards that came out of it. she really deserves to be happy. some may call it finally accepting defeat, but i think there was no competition to begin with. so to r and r, just take care of each other, alright?
meanwhile, i've got a lot of things to look forward to. ive been stuck in my idealistic outlook in life and i have to be open to the new world that awaits me.
im speaking this as a general rule, i will..
admit what i needed to admit.
appear furious when im furious.
scream when im hurt.
sing to the top of my lungs when i feel like it.
dance when my hips call for it.
cease comparing the present with the past.
stop putting up with jerks.
live life to the fullest.
this is called stop hypocrisy movement. do your own share. let your repressed self break free full blast. life is too short for apprehensions.
Friday, November 16, 2007
this calls for a celebration!!!
firstly, im coming home. that's enough reason to feel more than blessed.
and then... dandadandan...
ONE YEAR NA ANG BLOG KO!!! woohoo!!!
this is the first endeavor that i can say i poured my heart into. buti pa ang blog, nasasabi mo lahat. buti pa ang blog, hindi nagrereklamo.. buti pa ang blog , masaya! blogging is like the next best thing - after camera, washing machine, mp3 files and ben and jerry's ice cream.
i was rereading my posts and i was surprised on my evolution as a person in a one year span. i've gone from a restless girl ready to face the world -- to a questioning girl who got frustrated with her breadwinner status -- to a pathetic and desperate virgin -- to a wannabe photographer -- to an unfortunate jetsetter -- to a corporate slave -- to a gullible romantic -- and so much more!
if there is one thing that i am proud of at this moment, it would have to be this blog. this is my little baby.
happy birthday!
and then... dandadandan...
ONE YEAR NA ANG BLOG KO!!! woohoo!!!
this is the first endeavor that i can say i poured my heart into. buti pa ang blog, nasasabi mo lahat. buti pa ang blog, hindi nagrereklamo.. buti pa ang blog , masaya! blogging is like the next best thing - after camera, washing machine, mp3 files and ben and jerry's ice cream.
i was rereading my posts and i was surprised on my evolution as a person in a one year span. i've gone from a restless girl ready to face the world -- to a questioning girl who got frustrated with her breadwinner status -- to a pathetic and desperate virgin -- to a wannabe photographer -- to an unfortunate jetsetter -- to a corporate slave -- to a gullible romantic -- and so much more!
if there is one thing that i am proud of at this moment, it would have to be this blog. this is my little baby.
happy birthday!
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
how friendster profiles ruin my day
have you ever received a forwarded email mocking some friendster profiles? well i have my fair share of browsing some friendster profiles and getting irritated in the end.
eight out of ten girls wrote the same thing on the "about me" section. they all said "...first impression sakin mataray and snob but once you get to know me you'll realize that im a sweet simple girl blabla..." and they even wrote these with z's and countless h's at the end of every word. bummer! what has the world gotten into? argghhh.. good thing im not having my period today.
well, people think that im a bitch the first time they see me -- and find out that i really am.
ano ba.. walang katuturan tong pinagsusulat ko. blame it on the intimacy forums that i've been browsing whole day. hehe..
eight out of ten girls wrote the same thing on the "about me" section. they all said "...first impression sakin mataray and snob but once you get to know me you'll realize that im a sweet simple girl blabla..." and they even wrote these with z's and countless h's at the end of every word. bummer! what has the world gotten into? argghhh.. good thing im not having my period today.
well, people think that im a bitch the first time they see me -- and find out that i really am.
ano ba.. walang katuturan tong pinagsusulat ko. blame it on the intimacy forums that i've been browsing whole day. hehe..
Sunday, November 11, 2007
one more chance
i was watching the trailer of star cinema's new movie 'one more chance' as recommended by my friend. damn you leo! haha!
anyway, can i just say one line from the trailer is simply heart-wretching?
she had me at my worst. you had me at my best. and you chose to break my heart.
pota. what the? is this going to be another tissue moment?
im so going to watch this. i've so many things to look forward to on my homecoming!
anyway, can i just say one line from the trailer is simply heart-wretching?
she had me at my worst. you had me at my best. and you chose to break my heart.
pota. what the? is this going to be another tissue moment?
im so going to watch this. i've so many things to look forward to on my homecoming!
Friday, November 9, 2007
the devil sells plates
i watched "the devil wears prada" and i have to say that i could absolutely relate to the plot. well i don't have a hot male cohabitant, i do not have a celebrity admirer and i don't get to wear chanel or jimmy choo, but the thing about getting too engrossed about the things that i never thought i could or would do was a big shot to the heart.
let's see the similarities between andie sach's life and mine in general
- we are both promising young girls who are very idealistic when it comes to their careers. we are aware that we have so much potential and we aren't stopping at anything to achieve our goals.
- we are using our current jobs as a stepping stone to something greater. she wants to be known as a writer. and i, well, i just want to have a job that allows me to travel so i can apply at international organizations
- we do employment tasks apart from what we are supposed to do. our positions are intentionally vague to give the people who pay our rent the right to enslave us.
- we always run after time. constantly.
- we get calls during odd hours of the evening or morning.
- we work 26 hours a day.
- we often get challenged, basically do the impossible
now here comes the scary part...
- we both loved getting challenged.
- we are both willing to sacrifice our own lives to please our bosses.
- we excel in everything we do, and our bosses recognize that.
AND IT REACHED THE POINT WHEN WE SUBCONSCIOUSLY LOVE OUR JOB! what the?
now when do we reach the point when we throw our phones and just let everything go without a back up plan because we realized that this isn't what we wanted to do?
it scares the hell out of me. looks like im loving getting stuck..
no!!!
oh, im going to chile first week of december. argh.
let's see the similarities between andie sach's life and mine in general
- we are both promising young girls who are very idealistic when it comes to their careers. we are aware that we have so much potential and we aren't stopping at anything to achieve our goals.
- we are using our current jobs as a stepping stone to something greater. she wants to be known as a writer. and i, well, i just want to have a job that allows me to travel so i can apply at international organizations
- we do employment tasks apart from what we are supposed to do. our positions are intentionally vague to give the people who pay our rent the right to enslave us.
- we always run after time. constantly.
- we get calls during odd hours of the evening or morning.
- we work 26 hours a day.
- we often get challenged, basically do the impossible
now here comes the scary part...
- we both loved getting challenged.
- we are both willing to sacrifice our own lives to please our bosses.
- we excel in everything we do, and our bosses recognize that.
AND IT REACHED THE POINT WHEN WE SUBCONSCIOUSLY LOVE OUR JOB! what the?
now when do we reach the point when we throw our phones and just let everything go without a back up plan because we realized that this isn't what we wanted to do?
it scares the hell out of me. looks like im loving getting stuck..
no!!!
oh, im going to chile first week of december. argh.
Thursday, November 8, 2007
nov 7, 2007 is now considered one of my best days!
this post is about my little sister, but i have to claim this particular day as one of my best ever.
she passed the licensure exam for electronics and communications engineers! woohoo!
i knew she could do it. ever since we were little it has always been her dream. i am the outspoken daughter, and she is the techie one. while i resorted to my english textbook about subject-verb agreement, she was completing the last level of super mario video game. while i was doing her reflection papers, she was doing my presentations with magic stuff on different computer programs. it has always been like that. my parents would consult me on some opinions about current issues, and they would ask her to fix the tv and other home appliances.
you see, my sister and i have always been close. we relied on each other during our disastrous childhood days. we got each other's back now that we're supposed to act like mature adults. we are each other's strength. we are proud of each other's achievements no matter how people compare us. this would have to be the highlight of them all!
cheers! cheers!
it'll be a very good homecoming!
she passed the licensure exam for electronics and communications engineers! woohoo!
i knew she could do it. ever since we were little it has always been her dream. i am the outspoken daughter, and she is the techie one. while i resorted to my english textbook about subject-verb agreement, she was completing the last level of super mario video game. while i was doing her reflection papers, she was doing my presentations with magic stuff on different computer programs. it has always been like that. my parents would consult me on some opinions about current issues, and they would ask her to fix the tv and other home appliances.
you see, my sister and i have always been close. we relied on each other during our disastrous childhood days. we got each other's back now that we're supposed to act like mature adults. we are each other's strength. we are proud of each other's achievements no matter how people compare us. this would have to be the highlight of them all!
cheers! cheers!
it'll be a very good homecoming!
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
homecoming queen
who's coming home?
who's coming home after one year and four months?
c'est moi! c'est moi!
woot! woot!
i can hear the christmas bells! i can taste my mom's cooking! i can fight with her again! i can feel the hug of my father! i can chat about adult life with my sister! i can see the smile of my protege anjelica! i can dvd marathon at emmy's place!
wikee!
im going on the 17th to 25th.
yipee!
who's coming home after one year and four months?
c'est moi! c'est moi!
woot! woot!
i can hear the christmas bells! i can taste my mom's cooking! i can fight with her again! i can feel the hug of my father! i can chat about adult life with my sister! i can see the smile of my protege anjelica! i can dvd marathon at emmy's place!
wikee!
im going on the 17th to 25th.
yipee!
Saturday, November 3, 2007
alam mo ung feeling na...
tingin mo in-love ka pero wala ka namang particular na tao na iniisip? the best love song of all time, alanis m's head over feet keeps playing in my head. kilig pero wala talagang iniisip na tao.
ang labo. pero this week ang gaan gaan ng feeling ko kahit tadtad sa work. i feel pretty kahit lubog ang mata ko sa eye bags. i feel like smiling every time kahit inaapi ako ng unproductive colleagues.
maybe im really happy. i just don't admit it.
papa jesus, lubusin mo na. pengeng boyfriend!
ang labo. pero this week ang gaan gaan ng feeling ko kahit tadtad sa work. i feel pretty kahit lubog ang mata ko sa eye bags. i feel like smiling every time kahit inaapi ako ng unproductive colleagues.
maybe im really happy. i just don't admit it.
papa jesus, lubusin mo na. pengeng boyfriend!
Monday, October 29, 2007
a post with social relevance
i wanted this blog to be all about my personal experiences - my laughs, cries, triumphs, defeats, joys, heartbreaks, exhaustion and restlessness. but i guess it's about time that i say something about what is it about being a filipino in a place where our nationality is more known for being domestic helpers more than anything.
i have been indifferent about how people perceive filipinos. afterall, im ultimately just me. im not defined by any race or color. i am proud on how i grew up. this blsm is a product of her family's love, the institutions that molded her, the companionship of true and false friends and how she adapted into a cruel world after all these years. i came from a poor family, and i struggled every step of the way. but then again, that's another story.
but allow me to say my piece on how it feels like being one. i am one hundred percent filipino afterall, however i try to be individualistic.
patriotism aside, i have to say that it is more ideal to live in hong kong than manila. i could never walk alone in the pinas after nine in the evening. taking a cab is as dangerous as walking alone in dark areas and you have to press your cellphone keys inside your bag. you use your backpack infront and you can never be safe in movie houses or parking lots. these paranoia i have long let go when im in hk. hong kong may seem conservative since it should still center on chinese values, but it is the most liberated, not to mention safest place ever. but then there are times when you miss the chaos of it all.when you fear for your life everyday, you could not be more thankful that you are still alive the following day. but then again, i still wouldn't exchange being sure that no one's robbing my flat at night. it's peace of mind we're talking about here, and i'd do anything to sleep soundly when i retire to my comfy bed every two in the morning. let's leave it at that. it'll have to be another story.
i have to say that i am being "liked" in my workplace now. they can see that i am becoming indispensable, and they treat me as somebody who isn't a junior even though i am still way younger than all of them. they have so much confidence in me. i came from the "gifted nation" after all. during our canton party last week, they asked me to sing and i gladly accommodated their request. i sang i will survive and flashdance. i was sensational to say the least. all of our clients, contacts and my colleagues were surprised on how i performed. they know that filipinos are good performers and i proved them indeed.
one of my colleagues then asked me why are we still mired in poverty while we have what it takes for any nation to succeed. we are hardworking, we have rich natural resources, we are confident, we speak perfect english, and we have beautiful faces. most of these they lack, but how come the philippines is still a third world country without any chance of getting elevated any time soon? how come we resort to being helpers or prostitutes when we know we have what i takes to dream for more, not that being a househelp is something to be ashamed of.i couldn't find the answer.
being a girl who cries whenever the phils' national item is being played solemnly, i promised myself to be one of those many expats who show to the world that we are more than what they perceive us to be. i take pride in being one of the key persons at our client meetings full of westerners and gladly reply that i am from the phils when they ask me how come i speak good english. i tell them that we have a very beautiful country if they are looking for a good place to go for vacation. i tell them that we are a race of happy and intellectual people. we always manage to smile at our lowest point, for such unknown reason. maybe we know that at the end of the day everything will be alright, so why fret about it?
at least in my own little ways, i tell them that we are still a decent race. but how can i change their perception if more than one hundred thousand filipinos sit in central walkways every sunday with their make shift cardboard and leave their rubbish afterwards making every venue look like a disaster area, or if another five thousand prostitutes walk around wanchai every night harassing foreigners asking them if they want to have fun?
it's just frustrating. can't they just flock at parks and ensure that they clean their rubbish? can't they just do normal jobs? there are still a lot of employment opportunities for people with less education if they are only willing to do real work. you feel like your personal movement is getting in vain when this is what you see.
and now i read in the news about joseph estrada's presidential pardon. i felt like crying upon watching the news when i was in canton. i participated in that rally six years ago to oust him. i know that i will be telling my grandchildren how i stood up and fight corruption. after a six year trial, he was finally convicted. only to be pardoned days later. that's plain bullshit! this is our chance to tell the world that we do not have a mediocre government. and they screw it up!
it's darn frustrating.
i have been indifferent about how people perceive filipinos. afterall, im ultimately just me. im not defined by any race or color. i am proud on how i grew up. this blsm is a product of her family's love, the institutions that molded her, the companionship of true and false friends and how she adapted into a cruel world after all these years. i came from a poor family, and i struggled every step of the way. but then again, that's another story.
but allow me to say my piece on how it feels like being one. i am one hundred percent filipino afterall, however i try to be individualistic.
patriotism aside, i have to say that it is more ideal to live in hong kong than manila. i could never walk alone in the pinas after nine in the evening. taking a cab is as dangerous as walking alone in dark areas and you have to press your cellphone keys inside your bag. you use your backpack infront and you can never be safe in movie houses or parking lots. these paranoia i have long let go when im in hk. hong kong may seem conservative since it should still center on chinese values, but it is the most liberated, not to mention safest place ever. but then there are times when you miss the chaos of it all.when you fear for your life everyday, you could not be more thankful that you are still alive the following day. but then again, i still wouldn't exchange being sure that no one's robbing my flat at night. it's peace of mind we're talking about here, and i'd do anything to sleep soundly when i retire to my comfy bed every two in the morning. let's leave it at that. it'll have to be another story.
i have to say that i am being "liked" in my workplace now. they can see that i am becoming indispensable, and they treat me as somebody who isn't a junior even though i am still way younger than all of them. they have so much confidence in me. i came from the "gifted nation" after all. during our canton party last week, they asked me to sing and i gladly accommodated their request. i sang i will survive and flashdance. i was sensational to say the least. all of our clients, contacts and my colleagues were surprised on how i performed. they know that filipinos are good performers and i proved them indeed.
one of my colleagues then asked me why are we still mired in poverty while we have what it takes for any nation to succeed. we are hardworking, we have rich natural resources, we are confident, we speak perfect english, and we have beautiful faces. most of these they lack, but how come the philippines is still a third world country without any chance of getting elevated any time soon? how come we resort to being helpers or prostitutes when we know we have what i takes to dream for more, not that being a househelp is something to be ashamed of.i couldn't find the answer.
being a girl who cries whenever the phils' national item is being played solemnly, i promised myself to be one of those many expats who show to the world that we are more than what they perceive us to be. i take pride in being one of the key persons at our client meetings full of westerners and gladly reply that i am from the phils when they ask me how come i speak good english. i tell them that we have a very beautiful country if they are looking for a good place to go for vacation. i tell them that we are a race of happy and intellectual people. we always manage to smile at our lowest point, for such unknown reason. maybe we know that at the end of the day everything will be alright, so why fret about it?
at least in my own little ways, i tell them that we are still a decent race. but how can i change their perception if more than one hundred thousand filipinos sit in central walkways every sunday with their make shift cardboard and leave their rubbish afterwards making every venue look like a disaster area, or if another five thousand prostitutes walk around wanchai every night harassing foreigners asking them if they want to have fun?
it's just frustrating. can't they just flock at parks and ensure that they clean their rubbish? can't they just do normal jobs? there are still a lot of employment opportunities for people with less education if they are only willing to do real work. you feel like your personal movement is getting in vain when this is what you see.
and now i read in the news about joseph estrada's presidential pardon. i felt like crying upon watching the news when i was in canton. i participated in that rally six years ago to oust him. i know that i will be telling my grandchildren how i stood up and fight corruption. after a six year trial, he was finally convicted. only to be pardoned days later. that's plain bullshit! this is our chance to tell the world that we do not have a mediocre government. and they screw it up!
it's darn frustrating.
Monday, October 22, 2007
bad habit that's hard to break
i have one bad habit that i couldn't manage to change. i was brought up this way by my parents. we are a family of freak planners. and i mean planning so much about the future that we get stuck on that stage and we forget about the present.
my father buys a lottery ticket and we plan right away on how to spend the jackpot prize - we plan that we will buy a house lot in forbes village and buy three cars and establish a grocery business. i plan as early as october on the things that i will buy after holiday season upon receiving my christmas gifts. i plan on how to brag to my relatives the achievements on january when graduation takes place three months later.
you see, i was brought up as a freak. we were taught (excessively) to be positive at all times. there is nothing wrong in dreaming, but there comes a point when it gets a bit disadavantageous.
let me share the recent planning that i have done in my one and a half year stay in hk. background: im too desperate to get into a relationship. i cant give any other reason. oh, and these all happened in my head. come to think of it, i could be a cheesy movie writer afterall.
tt-the crushee boss
as you may read from my previous posts, i have already planned how we will hide our supposed relationship in the office. i see myself excusing from the office lunch and he will follow at my apartment discreetly. and when im too busy, i will say "tt, not now, im working" (in my serious-yet-if-you-know-how-to-push-the-right-button-ill-spread-my-legs-now voice) when he tries to tease me by playing with my hair when im seriously working on my laptop (i dont even have a laptop!). and i imagined that i will charm his 'rents with my pinoy ways so they can accept that their son loves me, a non-chinese.
what actually happened: he never found out. he's now in macau working for an airline company and he goes to hk every weekend to see his chinese gf.
aj1981
i met aj1981 at pinoyexchange. he is one of the most accommodating persons in the pinoy at hk thread. and im sure that he was born in 1981. just the perfect age for me! i emailed him a couple of times and we agreed to meet up. it was the first most realistic kilig feeling. my fantasies with my boss are, to say, just fantasies. but with aj1981 i actually thought that something could come out of it. we agreed to communicate through our mobile phones but the lines are so bad that we resorted to emailing instead. and he said that i better try to call him next time instead of the other way around because "it's not proper".. i was like, how can it be improper?
what actually happened? aj1981 is a girl! darn! but she's my good friend now. when im too stressed out at my life in hk, i go to her place in macau to get that sense of belongingness. her family is like my foster family.
beaverman
he's another guy i met at pinoyexchange. i wouldn't make the same mistake with aj1981. and this is really a good prospect because he would be most likely a guy deriving from his username. he was inquiring about the cost of living in hk and i gladly replied to all his queries - something i don't usually do. i have never been a good source of information especially to strangers, but i was really determined to make this guy mine, even if i had yet to meet him in person. even if we're just emailing at that time , i could already see how i will tell our future grandchildren how i and their grandfather fell in love. i will tell them that i loved their lolo beaverman even before i had seen him! (pota, i just realized now how cliche my fantasies were!) wouldn't it be nice to tell them that you could feel right away that this person is the "one" for you? the feeling was so strong at that time, and i could feel that this could be really "it". it felt like one of those days when you cheerfully wake up and you just know that it could be the best day of your life.
what actually happened: we became very good friends. he's like my first real male bestfriend in hk. we like the same stuff and we never run out of things to say. he has a gf in pinas. some people ask me why we never ended up together (how come they don't ask him instead?). i forgot to plan how to answer that.
that frat guy
i met him at some bar. he introduced himself to me and i don't usually get in typical situations. i have always been in bars but i was always with a throng of people. when i go to bars, i know i want to have fun, but i never entertained the idea of talking to strangers and chatting with them like forever as if you met your soulmate. it's just not my idea of starting my lovelife. i always imagined it to be in some tourist spot or in some convention but never in a bar! anyway, i met him in the gym two days later and it suddenly deemed to me that it could be destiny! we've been chatting like crazy for the nights that followed and he even asked me to join his singles for christ group. and would you believe that i actually attended some sfc meetings? i was like: this is the man that will change me forever. he will bring me close to God and we will have a good family foundation centered on Christian values. he's a good cook and he said he can go to my place and cook for me one weekend. and my planning abilities worked again: i could see myself getting delighted by his delicacies, literally and figuratively.
what actually happened: we lost touch after i forgot to answer his calls since i was too busy at work. he never cooked for me. he has a gf in hk, this i found out after he told me casually when we were going out. and he still owes me 300 dollars.
the guy whose name means universal
with my misfortunes from the guys above, you think i would have learned my lesson? you think i should have realized that i will die alone because i will keep on planning my love story and they end up getting unstarted and before i realized they are committed to somebody else already? probably not. another plan would not hurt. my fantasies have been crushed lots of times in my short stay in hk, so another stab shouldn't mean the end of the world. i should be numb to disappointments, shouldn't i? the difference with this one is that he actually liked me, and i could plan as much as i could. and who knows? maybe something better can transpire than what i had bargained for. and indeed it did. he moved me in so many different ways(yet most of these are very cliche.) but i dont know, this one is too good to be true. i imagined us getting married. but my plans were to have a prenuptial agreement where i claim half his fortune when i divorce him because he got too adulterous or unloving. but there are good plans as well: i know he's too hardworking so i see myself learning to cook so he can have a warm home cooked meal after a long day's work. i also see us groping in bed on a saturday evening because we rejected our friends' invitation for a night out (we both loved partying on a weekend) because we prefer to spend quality time together.
what actually happened: he ran off without properly saying goodbye. he calls me once in a blue moon and the last time he called he said that there's a possibility that he can go back to hk for good.
and i guess i reached the point where i got so fed up with having nothing after all these made-up scenarios. these feelings were true. i just didn't make them up. these are really good guys and i'd be happy if any of these fantasies happen. i don't plan any thing with the balding guy who lights his cigarette in front of the city plaza every seven in the evening.
but i guess that's how i know that im alive. im a pure masochist and one of my favorie lines in a song comes from goo goo dolls' iris: you bleed just to know you're alive. i think i agree with them: human life is all about disappointments. it's like a 1:10 ratio when it comes to triumph and disappointments. the best way to reap the fruits of your hardship and waiting is to undergo lots of disappointments. like i said why i loved photography: it only takes one shot to make it all worthwhile.
so ill continue planning when i meet another prospect. ill be as zestful as ever. i get more courageous every day and perhaps i can get the needed push to make things happen for once.
gosh, i cant believe i wrote a very long post because of my desperation! haha!
my father buys a lottery ticket and we plan right away on how to spend the jackpot prize - we plan that we will buy a house lot in forbes village and buy three cars and establish a grocery business. i plan as early as october on the things that i will buy after holiday season upon receiving my christmas gifts. i plan on how to brag to my relatives the achievements on january when graduation takes place three months later.
you see, i was brought up as a freak. we were taught (excessively) to be positive at all times. there is nothing wrong in dreaming, but there comes a point when it gets a bit disadavantageous.
let me share the recent planning that i have done in my one and a half year stay in hk. background: im too desperate to get into a relationship. i cant give any other reason. oh, and these all happened in my head. come to think of it, i could be a cheesy movie writer afterall.
tt-the crushee boss
as you may read from my previous posts, i have already planned how we will hide our supposed relationship in the office. i see myself excusing from the office lunch and he will follow at my apartment discreetly. and when im too busy, i will say "tt, not now, im working" (in my serious-yet-if-you-know-how-to-push-the-right-button-ill-spread-my-legs-now voice) when he tries to tease me by playing with my hair when im seriously working on my laptop (i dont even have a laptop!). and i imagined that i will charm his 'rents with my pinoy ways so they can accept that their son loves me, a non-chinese.
what actually happened: he never found out. he's now in macau working for an airline company and he goes to hk every weekend to see his chinese gf.
aj1981
i met aj1981 at pinoyexchange. he is one of the most accommodating persons in the pinoy at hk thread. and im sure that he was born in 1981. just the perfect age for me! i emailed him a couple of times and we agreed to meet up. it was the first most realistic kilig feeling. my fantasies with my boss are, to say, just fantasies. but with aj1981 i actually thought that something could come out of it. we agreed to communicate through our mobile phones but the lines are so bad that we resorted to emailing instead. and he said that i better try to call him next time instead of the other way around because "it's not proper".. i was like, how can it be improper?
what actually happened? aj1981 is a girl! darn! but she's my good friend now. when im too stressed out at my life in hk, i go to her place in macau to get that sense of belongingness. her family is like my foster family.
beaverman
he's another guy i met at pinoyexchange. i wouldn't make the same mistake with aj1981. and this is really a good prospect because he would be most likely a guy deriving from his username. he was inquiring about the cost of living in hk and i gladly replied to all his queries - something i don't usually do. i have never been a good source of information especially to strangers, but i was really determined to make this guy mine, even if i had yet to meet him in person. even if we're just emailing at that time , i could already see how i will tell our future grandchildren how i and their grandfather fell in love. i will tell them that i loved their lolo beaverman even before i had seen him! (pota, i just realized now how cliche my fantasies were!) wouldn't it be nice to tell them that you could feel right away that this person is the "one" for you? the feeling was so strong at that time, and i could feel that this could be really "it". it felt like one of those days when you cheerfully wake up and you just know that it could be the best day of your life.
what actually happened: we became very good friends. he's like my first real male bestfriend in hk. we like the same stuff and we never run out of things to say. he has a gf in pinas. some people ask me why we never ended up together (how come they don't ask him instead?). i forgot to plan how to answer that.
that frat guy
i met him at some bar. he introduced himself to me and i don't usually get in typical situations. i have always been in bars but i was always with a throng of people. when i go to bars, i know i want to have fun, but i never entertained the idea of talking to strangers and chatting with them like forever as if you met your soulmate. it's just not my idea of starting my lovelife. i always imagined it to be in some tourist spot or in some convention but never in a bar! anyway, i met him in the gym two days later and it suddenly deemed to me that it could be destiny! we've been chatting like crazy for the nights that followed and he even asked me to join his singles for christ group. and would you believe that i actually attended some sfc meetings? i was like: this is the man that will change me forever. he will bring me close to God and we will have a good family foundation centered on Christian values. he's a good cook and he said he can go to my place and cook for me one weekend. and my planning abilities worked again: i could see myself getting delighted by his delicacies, literally and figuratively.
what actually happened: we lost touch after i forgot to answer his calls since i was too busy at work. he never cooked for me. he has a gf in hk, this i found out after he told me casually when we were going out. and he still owes me 300 dollars.
the guy whose name means universal
with my misfortunes from the guys above, you think i would have learned my lesson? you think i should have realized that i will die alone because i will keep on planning my love story and they end up getting unstarted and before i realized they are committed to somebody else already? probably not. another plan would not hurt. my fantasies have been crushed lots of times in my short stay in hk, so another stab shouldn't mean the end of the world. i should be numb to disappointments, shouldn't i? the difference with this one is that he actually liked me, and i could plan as much as i could. and who knows? maybe something better can transpire than what i had bargained for. and indeed it did. he moved me in so many different ways(yet most of these are very cliche.) but i dont know, this one is too good to be true. i imagined us getting married. but my plans were to have a prenuptial agreement where i claim half his fortune when i divorce him because he got too adulterous or unloving. but there are good plans as well: i know he's too hardworking so i see myself learning to cook so he can have a warm home cooked meal after a long day's work. i also see us groping in bed on a saturday evening because we rejected our friends' invitation for a night out (we both loved partying on a weekend) because we prefer to spend quality time together.
what actually happened: he ran off without properly saying goodbye. he calls me once in a blue moon and the last time he called he said that there's a possibility that he can go back to hk for good.
and i guess i reached the point where i got so fed up with having nothing after all these made-up scenarios. these feelings were true. i just didn't make them up. these are really good guys and i'd be happy if any of these fantasies happen. i don't plan any thing with the balding guy who lights his cigarette in front of the city plaza every seven in the evening.
but i guess that's how i know that im alive. im a pure masochist and one of my favorie lines in a song comes from goo goo dolls' iris: you bleed just to know you're alive. i think i agree with them: human life is all about disappointments. it's like a 1:10 ratio when it comes to triumph and disappointments. the best way to reap the fruits of your hardship and waiting is to undergo lots of disappointments. like i said why i loved photography: it only takes one shot to make it all worthwhile.
so ill continue planning when i meet another prospect. ill be as zestful as ever. i get more courageous every day and perhaps i can get the needed push to make things happen for once.
gosh, i cant believe i wrote a very long post because of my desperation! haha!
Monday, October 15, 2007
effing shit!
in my delirious moments, i actually said that I LOVE MY JOB.
what the hell am i thinking?
well, i just realized that i was able to travel to 3 different continents in the last three months excluding asia. and i was always fortunate enough to dine at extravagant restaurants and actually do sightseeing.
and im learning a lot from every bullshit session as they call it.
if only they increase my salary, i would be thinking twice about leaving them in 8 months - which is an impossibility to say the least.
what the hell am i thinking?
well, i just realized that i was able to travel to 3 different continents in the last three months excluding asia. and i was always fortunate enough to dine at extravagant restaurants and actually do sightseeing.
and im learning a lot from every bullshit session as they call it.
if only they increase my salary, i would be thinking twice about leaving them in 8 months - which is an impossibility to say the least.
Monday, October 8, 2007
hay naku, i have another admirer
guys, pakisabi nga kay zac wala akong time para sa kanya. im so busy with work and he's too young for me. besides, i don't like ldr's. i've been in one and it wasn't easy. i know the thing about vanessa is just on screen bec of their show, and he was really mesmerized by my charms. but i think i have to let him go. i've got my priorities, and i can't juggle him with those.
HAHA! DREAM ON!
im ready to reveal my guilty pleasure - high school musical the movie! haha!
would you believe that i watch this every other night for two months now? never mind that there are so many goofs or loopholes in the story! or that the plot is as simple as tying your shoes! i love it. every second of it! i know all the dialogues and the songs by heart!
most especially zac efron. he's a living adonis! im so in love with him.
how about dreaming about a kid, who is famous in a kids' movie? i don't care! im still watching the movie tonight! just a glimpse of zac and i will be fine.
i love you zac! xoxo
stolen shot
who likes stolen shots? not me! when was the last time that i included myself in a tourist shot photo? in my last four trips abroad, i never had one. blame it on the photographer in me.
but i liked this photo from kuya tony's cam from the kjwan gig last saturday. it was originally a pic for marian, but i was included in the background.
forgive my vanity. this is the first time that im loving my chubby cheeks after months of uncontrollable gluttony. so might as well post it in my online journal. im only cropping my portion of the pic. marian may not be ready for stardom at this stage.
credits to the closet rocker kuya tony. ;)
but i liked this photo from kuya tony's cam from the kjwan gig last saturday. it was originally a pic for marian, but i was included in the background.
forgive my vanity. this is the first time that im loving my chubby cheeks after months of uncontrollable gluttony. so might as well post it in my online journal. im only cropping my portion of the pic. marian may not be ready for stardom at this stage.
credits to the closet rocker kuya tony. ;)
high dynamic range
my camera mentor dave is just the coolest! he asked to have some of my photos hdr'ed and he did a very fine job.
what he did was simply awe-inspiring.
let's compare them to the original:
here is one photo of some amulets that i took while in mexico city town proper:
and this is how it turned out when he did his magic tricks:
not much? well you can see finer details, and it gives you more creeps.
you'd be amazed at this one:
this is the photo of the mexico city fine arts theatre. it was a bit hazy when we went there and you wouldn't notice anything else apart from the theatre. you know the image is busy, but other elements are plainly unnoticeable.
until dave spent half an hour editing it. and here's the result:
it's so surreal! now you will notice the cars, the posters, the mountains, the flags, and all those little people doing their own business. the miracles of technology!
i want a laptop! i want to hdr all my photos!
what to do? im broke!
what he did was simply awe-inspiring.
let's compare them to the original:
here is one photo of some amulets that i took while in mexico city town proper:
and this is how it turned out when he did his magic tricks:
not much? well you can see finer details, and it gives you more creeps.
you'd be amazed at this one:
this is the photo of the mexico city fine arts theatre. it was a bit hazy when we went there and you wouldn't notice anything else apart from the theatre. you know the image is busy, but other elements are plainly unnoticeable.
until dave spent half an hour editing it. and here's the result:
it's so surreal! now you will notice the cars, the posters, the mountains, the flags, and all those little people doing their own business. the miracles of technology!
i want a laptop! i want to hdr all my photos!
what to do? im broke!
Friday, October 5, 2007
i wrote this while on board from mexico
To the one that got away:
I owe to you all the remaining good things about me that I am proud of.
You know the saying “love is all about bringing out the best in somebody”? It certainly was love in our case.
Do you know that I still feel blissful whenever I remember how you cried because you were so happy to have me? Do you know that I can still feel the warmth of your comforting hugs? Do you know that I am still sorry that we ended?
Of course you don’t. And I guess there’s a perfectly good reason why not.
tantanan na! magfling na lang habambuhay. hehe. ;p
I owe to you all the remaining good things about me that I am proud of.
You know the saying “love is all about bringing out the best in somebody”? It certainly was love in our case.
Do you know that I still feel blissful whenever I remember how you cried because you were so happy to have me? Do you know that I can still feel the warmth of your comforting hugs? Do you know that I am still sorry that we ended?
Of course you don’t. And I guess there’s a perfectly good reason why not.
tantanan na! magfling na lang habambuhay. hehe. ;p
Thursday, October 4, 2007
chinese natl day's fireworks show
good thing we arrived on the 30th, so we were still able to get a day off since it's china's natl holiday on the first of oct. i saw maia two hours after i landed, and we partied again til 3am. hehe. what did i say? work hard. play hard. besides im still struggling with jet lag.
i wasn't able to get a good location since i was still at the office editing my moscow pictures. i needed to empty my memory card so i could have space for the fireworks show.
here are my best shots:
this is my favorite:
i wasn't able to get a good location since i was still at the office editing my moscow pictures. i needed to empty my memory card so i could have space for the fireworks show.
here are my best shots:
this is my favorite:
the kremlin
when you think of russia, what first comes to mind? well, apart from vodka and caviar?
kremlin! kremlin!
this is russia's intramuros!
i paid 350rubles to get to the kremlin area. you can see a total of 7 cathedrals. though presently you can only see five because 2 are under renovation.
we finished 4pm at the fair. and the kremlin closes at 5pm. so this is another speed sightseeing. here are my photos of the cathedrals:
this is the place for the religious! the insides of the cathedrals are overwhelmingly filled with centuries-old religious murals. captivating.
some of the buildings within the walled area:
for whom the giant broken bell tolls?
nice! i love moscow!
next goal: go backpacking in europe soon!
kremlin! kremlin!
this is russia's intramuros!
i paid 350rubles to get to the kremlin area. you can see a total of 7 cathedrals. though presently you can only see five because 2 are under renovation.
we finished 4pm at the fair. and the kremlin closes at 5pm. so this is another speed sightseeing. here are my photos of the cathedrals:
this is the place for the religious! the insides of the cathedrals are overwhelmingly filled with centuries-old religious murals. captivating.
some of the buildings within the walled area:
for whom the giant broken bell tolls?
nice! i love moscow!
next goal: go backpacking in europe soon!
moscow river cruise
what is the other tour package that we availed?
obviously from the title of this post - the moscow river cruise! woot woot! it's like giving you a two hour peek of all of moscow's attractions. you can see red square, kremlin's cathedral, russia's prized buildings. it's like a one stop shop!
we paid 500hk for this package. it includes a buffet dinner, which i wasn't able to abuse because there wasn't much choices, and the food is too bland.
also, taking photos proved to be a difficult task. how about battling 6 degrees of cold temperature in the middle of a body of water? i could feel my hands numbing. but i took photos nevertheless.
some giant statue built in the middle of the river. if memory serves me right, this is one of their heroes, st peter:
a nice structure with one of moscow's scenic bridges:
alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5117467399759745298" />one of the multitude of churches around the city. this is like hk's 7-11. there's one in every block!
the first chocolate factory in russia. it's been established since the 19th century.
this is their executive building. very nice. lovely.
another lovely building that stands out in the chilly night:
and this proved to be my lucky day. how about ending the cruise with a coincidental fireworks show? i love fireworks! woot! woot!
moscow's red square
i am lucky because the fair's exhibition hall is just outside the red square. we do not really have time for sightseeing during the day. but my colleague permitted me to go to another fair which requires me to pass by the red square. these photos are taken in speed. i wouldn't want to give a bad impression to my colleague so i had to return fast. we're there for hte fair afterall.
this is the entrance to the red square:
i have already said that russian is a beautiful race, haven't i? hehe, i would date this russian guy even if i get to pay the tab or he couldn't understand me at all.
the back of the red dreamy structure:
that is the red building, and the yellowish builing at the right is a very high end mall. such a long mall, i wouldn't find my way out if i get inside:
this is my perspective side of one of the sides of the mall:
in case you don't know where the mall is, these statues can help you out (one is pointing at it already):
of course, the basilica. it never failed to amaze me everytime we see it on the way to the fair, to the aiport, hotel, etc:
this is the other side of the red square:
another red structure, however much simpler:
