and you think you're a loser?

i hereby declare june 13, 2007 as my most unfortunate date for this year of the pig so far.

shet. shet. shet.

if you are feeling extremely low today, just read what i went through today and you'll feel like there isn't any thing to fuss about. come on, blsm is way too unblessed today compared to you.

1. i slept late from the night before. i was told that i would go to south africa with my boss. confirmed. this will be my first client visit abroad. i can feel ants in my pants. this is what i went here for - to be able to travel for free. never mind the meager salary, as long as i get to stay in nice hotels and ride long haul flights, i couldn't be bothered. but then it occurred to me, i wasn't really used to presenting myself in a decent manner. believe me, im ill-mannered, wild, boisterous and very child-like (if not childish). breathe, breathe...this is too much pressure! more than i could ever imagine! how can they put so much weight in a 23 year old little girl? sure im doing fine when we have client meetings here, but it's going to be different when we go there. we're outnumbered and yet we do all the convincing. we'll be like rabbits thrown in a lion's den. then i found an online book by emily post about etiquettes, just to at least brush up on some general manners. and boy, was i too scared! the pages seemed endless. i have only read until the first four chapters and it was very frustrating. four chapters devoted only to introducing yourself - who gets to present whom, when to bow, etc. i wasn't prepared for any prim and proper guidelines at all! how can i keep up? primmed people were trained since they were kids, and i only have to go by the book in 10 days. i don't even think i got class in my genes. what now??? waaahhh!!!!

2. i found a cockroach in one of the dishes in our lunch. talk about losing your appetite for a frustrating day.

3. got turned down by other members of the photography club. i was tasked to get two non-exhibitors to cover the opening of the exhibit on saturday. and they are all not available. what now???

4. im sort of hanging around (i wouldn't really call it dating) with some guy now and he is terribly sick with flu. i kept on following up with him for three days now, but it seems that he is in no condition to see anyone. of course i understand the situation. he's too tired to even bother talking to anybody. but can you imagine the frustration on my part? i am not really a caring person and it's rare that i show concern to some body. and it is a big blow to be turned down when you are so stuck with the idea of being nice for once. i didn't mind if i looked too eager, too pathetic or too desperate - but only to be turned down incessantly.


5. got turned down by another friend. the task was really simple. just put the flyers in the bar where he'll go tonight. and i was turned down! i believe that friendships are supposed to be a mutual exchange of favors. and when you bug me in the middle of night borrowing for money, the least you can do is reflex a few muscles and put the flyers on the table.

6. was informed that the only non-exhibitor that is supposedly sure to cover the opening is going to be late. how about that? no one to cover the event at all!!!

7. with all these, i needed to do therapy. and what could it be? of course photography! i decided on finally doing my plan of walking along hong kong island and just snap photos of its structures armed with tripod and pda to keep me company on the day that i struggle to reverse the tides. and you think i can finally end my misfortunes for the day? it rained really hard after 5 mins i had gone out! no more therapy! im so going to lose my nerve.

8. so i went to the gym instead. and guess what? i forgot my padlock! now im going to work out bringing a giant backpack. and i'll get paranoid when i take a shower because i'll be leaving my stuff in the unsecured lockers. damn.

9. oh, i forgot to mention. im having problem with my south african visa. the general manager couldn't furnish a company letter since she still needs to get bank endorsement. and she blames me since i didn't ask for a letter earlier. why can't this day end???

anyway, im writing this post on the free computer in the gym. i need to let them all out before i encounter any more misfortune. and i haven't enumerated the endless problems of my accounts at work!

i still got one and a half hour left. what else can wrong???

no more please.